Ethan started preschool today. Or rather, Ethan grabbed preschool by the horns today and wrestled it to the ground.
"He's never been to preschool?" said the director, amazed. "You wouldn't know!"
I was worried about leaving him. New place, new people. But I should have known better: He may look like a clone of preschool-aged me, but he's most definitely not me. He walked right in, said hello to his teachers, and started baking some bread in the play kitchen.
Now I have two hours until preschool is over to sit in a quiet apartment and contemplate life. I can tease out the tangled threads of emotion I feel about all this: He obviously loves being around kids, yet I project my own insecurities about being the New Person onto him. I feel like taking care of him is my job (especially since I quit the one that actually paid money), but now for 20 hours a week, other (very friendly, very trustworthy) people will care for him. I know he needs to be around other kids, but part of me wants him to only need me.
I now have 20 hours a week to myself—almost a whole calendar day. And frankly, I don't know what to do. I think I'll start by taking a nap.
5 comments:
Congrats to the both of you. I am sure he'll be full of pictures and stories.
Ha! It will take you a week to adjust, but then you'll have all this extra time to do what you do best.... write! Anxiously anticipating more of your tales...
xo
Kate
Slam—My favorite story of the day was about his two new female friends, whose names he couldn't remember, but who identified as "Stripes" and "Polka Dots," based on their outfits. He'll make a great, observant husband someday.
CG—Thanks for the encouragement :) I really am excited about the possibilities for my free time.
I remember the first week or so when kids were tots and I worked a few nights at the paper but had a few days of daycare, I was torn between doing fun things or productive chore things with my time, so I froze and got nothing done. It's just the novelty.
And preschool may not always be smooth sailing, after the novelty wears off for Ethan. But peer socializing is good for him. And then there's the after-preschool play dates with other moms, all kinds of possibilities!
Wonderful updates all around (especially the delievery-lady, get it girlfriend, I don't even carry the laundry upstairs, much less the machines). Cullen started preschool this week too and it was intensely more emotional for me. He could also name every kid in his class by the end of the week and I still forget our nextdoor neighbor's name. Ah, to be a toddler.
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