Wednesday, January 20

We'll call ourselves The Migraines

Today I woke up in the wee hours with a splitting headache. It turns out the world is a lot more annoying when your head feels like it's about to pop off your spine, even if you take two Darvocet and pass out until a quarter to 11 in the morning.

For instance, your mother's verbal faux pas which are normally amusing turn into major aggravations. For instance, one doesn't "vote" for a team, one "roots" for a team, but Mom insists on asking during any sporting event—tennis, football, basketball, etc.—who we're voting for. Sadly, sports are not a democracy.

Instead of being the song of angels, the shrill single note of a two-year-old forcing his lung capacity through a recorder sounds more like a pubescent duck screaming for its life. And today. Today would be the day the dog decides to whine incessantly ALL DAY LONG PLEASE HELP ME at the space of nothingness between the couch and the fireplace. What does he think he sees? Even now he whines, the upper register of his despair threatening to shatter my glass skull.

And now I'm resorting to the metaphors of bad emo music.

Can't you just see it now? Me, hair dyed black with platinum highlights, blackened eyes and nude lips, too-tight skinny jeans and dramatic silver bangles, leaning over my bass guitar and whinging into the microphone about upper registers of despair and my glass skull shattering while a brooding band plays tortured minor chords. We'll be huge in Europe.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Erin just took my face in her hands and said "Remember, no matter what I write about you, I still love you". I knew I was in trouble!

It is a difficult burden to bear, being endearing to one's daughter one day and then on another day being a flippin pain in the neck.

Oh well, I still love her anyway!

Erin's mum

Bethany said...

Where can I BUY TICKETS!?!

Natalie said...

Very descriptive. Just make sure you have some weird metaphor and slightly random images of your cats and possibly a staircase going off to nowhere.

Hope the migraine doesn't last too much longer! Super B-Complex vitamins really helped my hubby to prevent...so that's absolutely useless knowledge right now but good for the future, right?!

thewarriorpoets said...

Since the Bears are out of it, I vote for the Vikings. Just becase the Favre thing would be a great story.

And it's poltergeist. That's what he's staring at, between the couch and the fire place. Ghosts get cold too.

Kate said...

@Erin's Mum - very sweet of you!
Get better soon!

Costume Diva said...

Oh girl! Migraines rule my life. I feel you.

Erin said...

Erin's Mum—You're always a pain in the neck. It's just some days I handle it better than others.

Bethany—Ticketmaster, myspace, etc.

Natalie—You know, I don't get migraines often, but I've had a couple in the past year, so now I know what the lead-in feels like. As soon as I notice it, I'll load up on Super B.

thewarriorpoets—You know, I'm on the fence with Favre. I mean, how many times can somebody retire and unretire? And cry about it? And don't frighten me, please.

Kate—I am better now, thanks.

Costume Diva—I had no idea what Migraine People went through until last year. At least mine only seem to last a day, with a little niggly pain the next day in the aftermath.

Jen said...

Oh dear Erin - feel better :(

stephanie said...

erin - i hope you feel better. my mom gets migraines and awful doesn't even begin to describe how horrible they are. your blog is so entertaining and i really enjoy reading :)

Lisa@Pickles and Cheese said...

I hope your head is better today. This weather cannot be helping. Feel better soon!

Bethany AKA Mother of the Munchkins said...

Sorry about the migraine but I had to laugh on your mom, voting in sports? Who knew! LOL The dog barking at the wall though, kind of has me freaked, so I have to ask, is he wearing socks? ;)

Single Parent Dad said...

Massive in Scandinavia. Perhaps that could even be the name for your band.

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