For the life of me, I can't remember why I asked the question, but I did, and there was no turning back.
Me: So when you used to play Dungeons and Dragons, did you, like, dress up and talk in weird accents and stuff?
Noah: No! It's more like a board game and a video game put together. And you have characters that are represented on the board by little figurines. But we would just use other stuff, like a piece of a Starburst or a wadded up piece of paper, and that's what we'd play with.
Me: You're going to have to explain that to me.
Noah: Well, you have this dungeon master, who blahbity blah blah wah wah dwarf! blahbity blah blah...
Me: [to self] That ceiling fan really needs to be dusted. Watching it spin like this...the spinning...is... so... hypnotizing...
[Several minutes later...]
Noah: So what kind of character do you want to be?
Me: Huh, uh, what? What'd you say? I wasn't listening.
Noah: You asked me to explain it!
Me: I know! It was an accident. I mean, I'm just so used to tuning out that kind of stuff!
Noah: Okay, well we're making you a character.
Me: Okay. Like what?
Noah: Well you can be a dwarf or an elf or...
Me: I'll be an elf.
Noah: And do you want to be a blahbity blah blah or a blah wah wah...
Me: [mentally drifting, then recommitting to concentrating really hard] Um, what?
Noah: Do you want to be a druid or a...
Me: Yes. Druid.
Noah: Okay, you're an elf druid. Where do you want to be from?
Me: Also? I'd like to be a druid princess.
Noah: Fine. Well basically what happens now is that the dungeon master would start the story up, where say my character would meet your character somehow, and then we'd go on adventures.
Me: So, he just makes it up?
Noah: Sure. I remember this one time [starts laughing] the funniest thing happened [laughing] when our dungeon master made one guy who was a dwarf [laughing really hard now] come upon this mountain where there were other dwarves [hysterically laughing] and blahbity blah wah wah wah blah...
Me: [to self] I wonder what's going on in the tennis match. I can't believe Andy Murray is out. Dismal performance. That's really sad about Nadal's parents, too. And how about that Oudin! I hope she can pull off another upset. Gee, I wonder when my next haircut is. I'll have to figure out what I want to do with it...
Noah: ...and we were all, a magical hammer?!?! Ha ha ha!
Me: Ha ha! Yeah, that's hilarious.
Noah: That probably didn't make you want to get it on with me, did it?
Me: Well, good night.