Tuesday, August 26

We're a regular Ward and June Cleaver

There have been questions about yesterday's post, mainly regarding the veracity of my "news" story. The funniest part about that fake news story is the story itself, including quotes, is 100% true, right down to people calling in the chemical spill that turned out to be cucumbers.

Also, just to clear things up, Mike Honcho is the name Will Ferrell's friend in Talladega Nights said he used when he posed nude for Playgirl. Why Noah chose Mike Honcho as his pseudonym has less to do with his past taking nude photos than it does the name just sounds good for a fictional police officer. At the suggestion of a friend (thanks Kathryn!), you could very well hear more about Officer Mike Honcho in the future.

I have to say, though, Noah's adventures at work provide plenty of fodder for writing and storytelling. I have a feeling that the "How was your day?" conversations in most households don't go anything like ours. So I've provided a sample. Again, all stories are 100% true, but all names have been changed to protect the criminals.

Erin: Anything interesting happen today?
Noah: I saw a guy's butt and penis.

Erin: So what'd you guys do yesterday?
Noah: We wrestled a violently thrashing kid to the ground, then he totally farted in our faces.

Erin: Rough day at the office?
Noah: A large, fat drunk man called me pretty.

Erin: Did you have any downtime at work?
Noah: I was able to read a little Tennis magazine. And a 50-year-old mental patient who called herself Sugar Pie asked me if it was 'one of those naked magazines.'

Erin: Meet anyone new today?
Noah: Yeah, the ugliest woman I've ever seen. And when I looked at her license, her name was Martin Jones. So that explained it.

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